As of now

Today is one of those days where I've forgotten what I'm doing here. The hostel is depleating my energy. I keep telling myself that this job is a joke, and that anyone would love to take people on pub crawls and to beach parties for work, but after months of this this routine 4 times a week -- the same pubs, the same type of guests -- it's draining. It's also the fact that I never really get a break because I live here. I eat, sleep, shower, etc. with these people, and everyone always has questions and wants to socialize. There's no privacy, and we the staff always have to put on a happy, approachable face otherwise our star rating goes down on HostelBookers, which forces Gonza to lower the bed prices, which means we are compensated less.

I really do love hostel work because of the people I meet -- the remarkably interesting nomads from all over the world with unbelievable life stories, the "lost" ones who have no idea what they're doing with their lives and just keep hopping around looking for answers. I love these ones because I can relate and they make me feel less alone and crazy.

Then there's my hostel's demographic: 18 to 21-year-old American tourists. Need I say more? This is why I'm angry and exhausted and have a shitty attitude.

I really need to get some headspace and shed some of this anxiety and irritation.

My friend circle has been dwindling here, as everyone is moving on with their travels or going "home". I think this might be my cue to re-evalutate my situation and ease out of hostel world (or at least this hostel). I've gotten too comfortable here. I need to start making art again, and for that I need fresh inspiration.

I plan to move to Italy in January. Probably Florence. I love Italy too much not to live there for awhile. But if money is a problem, I may end up in South Korea or Vietnam for a school semester or two -- I know that seems like such a drastic alternative, but my objective is to see new things and throw myself out of my comfort zone, so the location doesn't really matter as long as it's new. I can make a good amount of money teaching English there.

If you have any resources for an American wanting to work in Florence, please send me all the things!

Besos.